Confession of a Protoss Cannon Rusher

I have a confession to make. I only cannon rush in StarCraft 2. Not to crush noobs, not to farm easy wins—I do it because it’s the only way I can actually enjoy the game. My job is stressful, my family life even more so. I have young kids, and as much as I love them, they’re a handful. There’s never a quiet moment, never a break. By the time they’re finally asleep, I get maybe an hour—maybe less—before I have to sleep myself and do it all over again.

That’s why I play protoss. It’s the one race where I can shut off my brain and just play. But there’s one thing I can’t stand—macro games. They’re slow, the're boring, they take forever. When I see that my opponent is going for a third, I know I’m in for at least 20 minutes of macro play, strategic decisions, and agonizing engagements. I don’t have 20 minutes. If want a banana, if someone needs their back groomed, I have to quit mid-game anyway.

So, I cheese. Every single time. The moment I have my first pylon, I put down a forge and queue up next pylons in his base. Call it weak, call it unfair—I don’t care. I just want to enjoy the little time I have, and macro games are anything but that . They are just plain joyless. Maybe one day I’ll stop. But for now, I’ll keep cheesing, because this game is my escape, and I need it more than I’d like to admit.

Judge me if you want. I probably deserve it. But being protoss-brained is hard—both in-game and in life.